A local Alaskan photographer, Mark Meyer, has a slideshow in today's NYT online.

Super cool.

Way to go, Mark!

http://www.nytimes.com/slideshow/2009/11/20/travel/escapes/20091120-amer-slideshow_index.html

Cheery to no end

Had a photoshoot today with a friend for her weekly photography project. I was the first in her weekly portraits.

Bravely, she admitted that she thought ukulele music was hokey. *tisk*

Now she'll have to put up with me sending her links to videos for the next 6 months.

Click here to get to the set (of 2) on Valette's Flickr page.

Violent movies I love...

I started thinking about violent movies last week when Luke invited me to go see American History X with him and a friend at the Beartooth Theater Pub.

I declined.

I can't watch that movie (again).

It's funny because Luke doesn't like gorey movies. He won't even watch Shaun of the Dead. How will he get through this totally violent movie?

Anyway, my favorite violent movies are:

Caligula: fisting, rape, castration, murder and Penthouse Pets. It's the Penthouse Pets that get me through.

Pulp Fiction: except the part when Tarentino is actually in the movie. The man makes me crazy.

Shaun of the Dead: Good for some zombie bashing. It's funny, there's good music...and Shaun is a great easy halloween costume.

Silence of the Lambs: Altogether brilliant.

Q:So why can I watch these movies with blood and torture and killing but not American History X?

A:I can't stand the nature of the crimes in AHX. The curb stomp scene is terrible. Hate crimes make me queasy and bring tears to my eyes.

There's no way I would willingly view something that makes me feel like that.

ouch embarrassing

The Anchorage Municipal website is undergoing some changes. They are pushing a uniform website for all departments. This doesn't seem to be a new concept. Before I left Virginia there was a similar project happening there. There is certain content that the library can control and certain content that it cannot. Funny enough, the library banner (that is, first of all, barely readable) is NOT under control over the content editors for the library but the New-Muni.org Task Force is.

And there's a misspelling.

Perhaps it's not large enough for you to see...above the picture of The Cat in the Hat is written "Dr Suess".

What kind of dingbats...? I'm ashamed. But, like I said, WE HAVE NO CONTROL OVER IT.

new ukulele

Here's a picture of my new KoAloah Noah short scale soprano ukulele:

banjo uke

I've spent some time tonight playing my banjo-uke. It was made by this guy. The particular video I link to is the one I was using.  

I've been desperate to learn clawhammer since I saw my friend Matthew play his banjo. I'm not sure I have the coordination but it's a goal for the summer.

My new apartment is rad. The neighbors (upstairs) are a little loud but I'll drown them out with my music.

ukulele stuffs

Ukulele stuff I just ordered:

A Shag Wahini sticker,

a ukulele sized stand (instead of my big-ole guitar stand),

new strings for my Pineapple Sunday,

2 wall ukulele wall hangers (instead of my guitar wall hangers),

King Kukulele & the Friki Tikis--Live at Trader Vics,

and King Kukulele & the Friki Tikis--Luau in December (via iTunes).

I've also ordered quite a bit of old-timey sheet music from eBay.  I found Ev'ryone Says I Love You online also.  It's tuned weird and I'm going to have a hell of a time learning it but I love a challenge.  

I also found this that I really, really, really, really, really, really want.  But I didn't buy it!  See how good I am?!

The Masque of Mandragora

I've taken the liberty of checking out a novelization of the Doctor Who serial The Masque of Mandragora. The first two paragraphs of the introduction by Harlan Ellison make me want to go no further lest I be terribly disappointed. There's no story that can beat a potential geek fight:

"They could not have been more offended, confused, enraged and startled...and then an eruption of angry voices from all over the fifteen hundred person audience. The kids in their Luke Skywalker pajamas and the retarded adults spot-welded into their Darth Vader fright-masks howled with fury. But I stood my ground, there on the lecture platform at the World Science Fiction Convention, and I repeated the heretical words that had sent them into animal hysterics: 'STAR WARS is adolescent nonsense; CLOSE ENCOUNTERS is obscurantist drivel; STAR TREK can turn your brains into puree of bat guano; and the greatest science fiction series of all time is DOCTOR WHO! And I'll take you all on, one-by-one or all in a bunch to back it up!'"

(This heretic hadn't even seen the 3 Star Wars prequels!)

I really like Star Wars (I don't even consider the prequels). I've never been big into Star Trek but I'm sure it's not that bad. But I do agree that Doctor Who is superior. Not only is it great storytelling, it's got a frickin' legacy! 46 years?! C'mon! I just don't have the guts to say it in front of a bunch of geeks dressed up in their gear at a sci-fi convention!

new artwork

We went to Homer last week.  Among the things to do in Homer (going to the meadery, going to the winery, going to the brewery) browsing art shops is one of the least glamorous.  But it's great.  Homer has beautiful scenery and that alone is enough to inspire artistic genius.  Unfortunately the proportion of bad artistry is just as high-if not slightly higher-than everywhere else.

There was one piece that I found that I loved, though.  There were half-a-dozen pieces by the same artist, using the same technique, but this one was above and beyond my favorite.  Essentially, the artist created wooden inlays.  There was an Orca jumping out of the water, a sultry woman, a moose on ice skates (seriously--eccchhh!).  I was almost put off from buying the one I liked.

Anyway, I went back the next day and put my money down on the table, "Wrap it up!" I said.  

No, but the artist happened to be there (so I'm glad I didn't speak so honestly about the rest of his artwork) and I praised his picture.  It just happened to be his favorite as well (imagine that).  

Anyway, no more belaboring it:

Forgive the cybermen invasion.  I haven't found a good place for it yet. 

WBMC 2009

Yesterday we attended the World Beard & Moustache Championships in downtown Anchorage.  It was certainly a celebration of facial hair...and of course I participated.

Blag

So, National Poetry Month ended up being a bust as I seizured, slept, and recovered from my, well, seizure.

Everything's okay. My MRI and EEG came back clear and there have been no repeat occurrences. I'm medication free for the time being.

Anyway...

I'm putting a halt on my concertina lessons until August because work is about to get REALLY stressful. Summer Reading starts on Saturday and promises to be a lot of fun and a lot of work. The theme is Be Creative (or Express Yourself! for teens) and not only am I doing two storytime programs a week w/ukulele accompaniment but I foolishly agreed to take on a Fractured Fairy Tales program the first week in June AT ALL THE LOCATIONS. Egad! The program has been put together for awhile. I just need to come up with some MadLib inspired Fairy Tales to do with the kids during the program (also one for them to take home).

Again, EGAD!

But I'm excited about the other programming: Jugglers and magicians, musicians and Mad Science. I'm not excited about the late-comers and the over-crowding, the constant business and the inability to take a vacation.

Trying to remain optimistic.

No poem today.

It's been a long day.  No poem today. 

Here's why.

4/18-The Pythons-

In honor of my going to see Spamalot this evening, today's poem-of-the-day is a video.

Enjoy:

4/17-Voltaire-

Probably my favorite public intellectual/author is Voltaire. There's little I love more than thinking about the rivalry between Jean-Jacques Rousseau and Voltaire. That's not really something that happens today. Sure Christopher Hitchens can take the piss out of Mos Def on national television, but it's not nearly as fun as thinking about two absolutely brilliant people publicly pronouncing their hatred for one another...especially when everyone likes Voltaire better because he wasn't such a grumpy old poop.

Anyway, on to the poetry!

FROM LOVE TO FRIENDSHIP

by: Voltaire (François Marie Arouet, 1694-1778)

If you would have me love once more,

The blissful age of love restore;

From wine's free joys, and lovers' cares,

Relentless time, who no man spares,

Urges me quickly to retire,

And no more to such bliss aspire.

From such austerity exact,

Let's, if we can, some good extract;

Whose way of thinking with this age

Suits not, can ne'er be deemed a sage.

Let sprightly youth its follies gay,

Its follies amiable display;

Life to two moments is confined,

Let one to wisdom be consigned.

You sweet delusions of my mind,

Still to my ruling passion kind,

Which always brought a sure relief

To life's accurst companion, grief.

Will you forever from me fly,

And must I joyless, friendless die?

No mortal e'er resigns his breath

I see, without a double death;

Who loves, and is beloved no more,

His hapless fate may well deplore;

Life's loss may easily be borne,

Of love bereft man is forlorn.

'Twas thus those pleasures I lamented,

Which I so oft in youth repented;

My soul replete with soft desire,

Vainly regretted youthful fire.

But friendship then, celestial maid,

From heaven descended to my aid;

Less lively than the amorous flame,

Although her tenderness the same.

The charms of friendship I admired,

My soul was with new beauty fired;

I then made one in friendship's train,

But destitute of love, complain.

http://www.poetry-archive.com/v/from_love_to_friendship.html

4/16-Jon Agee-

I love Jon Agee. He's funny. His illustrations are bright and colorful. I couldn't resist using this for a Poem of the Day.


The title poem "Orangutan Tongs" is among the least tongue-twisty of all the poems in this collection (I actually made it through without a single mistake).

Here it is:
--------------------------------------
Orangutan Tongs

An orangutan went into Wong's.
He ordered the pork and the prawns.
But he couldn't eat pork with a knife and a fork,
So they brought the Orangutan tongs.
Orangutan tongs, orangutan tongs,
They brought the orangutan tongs.

The next day it happened at Kong's.
He ordered the prunes and the prawns.
But he couldn't eat prunes with a fork or a spoon,
So they brought the orangutan tongs.
Orangutan tongs, orangutan tongs,
They brought the orangutan tongs.
--------------------------------------------
My favorite (because of the picture really--a little boy on the beach with his hands down his underpants):
--------------------------------------------
Undies

There are lots of holes in Andy Bundy's undies.
His mom should get some thread and try to stitch 'em.
When Andy's at the beach, he's always cranky and upset,
'Cause Andy Bundy's sandy undies itch him.
---------------------------------------------

Highly recommended book.

4/15-Taxes-

This is not a particularly good example of artistry or of the skill and effort most people put into poetry. But it's tax day (relevant) and it's been busy and it's getting late and I'm tired (and full of excuses, apparently).

The Tax Poem

Tax his land, tax his wage,
Tax his bed in which he lays.
Tax his tractor, tax his mule,
Teach him taxes is the rule.

Tax his cow, tax his goat,
Tax his pants, tax his coat.
Tax his ties, tax his shirts,
Tax his work, tax his dirt.

Tax his chew, tax his smoke,
Teach him taxes are no joke.
Tax his car, tax his grass,
Tax the roads he must pass.

Tax his food, tax his drink,
Tax him if he tries to think.
Tax his sodas, tax his beers,
If he cries, tax his tears.

Tax his bills, tax his gas,
Tax his notes, tax his cash.
Tax him good and let him know
That after taxes, he has no dough.

If he hollers, tax him more,
Tax him until he's good and sore.
Tax his coffin, tax his grave,
Tax the sod in which he lays.

Put these words upon his tomb,
"Taxes drove me to my doom!"
And when he's gone, we won't relax,
We'll still be after the inheritance tax.

Note: I'm not bitter about taxes. I actually got a ton of money back this year.

4/12-by kids-

There are lots of great poetry sites for kids. When I was young (and the Internet was too) we had a writing contest. The winners' books were "bound" (spiral bound, as I remember) and were invited to attend a writing workshop where you could share and learn more. I wrote a book of poetry one year and won. I was soooo happy. I'm sure my mom kept it somewhere, I just have no idea where it went.

I illustrated it to, which would make it worth finding. Anyway, here's a great poem written by a (presumably) British girl:

I Was Going To Write A Poem Today by Maria English (aged 12)

I was going to write a poem today
But I'm afraid to say I can't.
My mind's as empty as a barrel
And every time the faintest trace of an idea appears in my head
It glides like a fish
And slips and slides its way out of my mind
Before I can grab it.

I'm tired of thinking
All through the day
And my brain has gone to bed
He's curled up in a bundle
Cosy, inside my head.

My intellect has gone a-wandering
Over the wide, blue sea of knowledge
And she's taken my memory as a boat
Sailing over the endless horizon
Bobbing up and down
On the waves.

I was going to write a poem today
But I'm afraid to say I can't.
My tap of words has run dry
And a greedy drought
Has soaked up my pool of thoughts

http://www.poetryzone.ndirect.co.uk/index2.htm

4/12-Ferlinghetti-

To the Oracle at Delphi
by Lawrence Ferlinghetti

Great Oracle, why are you staring at me,
do I baffle you, do I make you despair?
I, Americus, the American,
wrought from the dark in my mother long ago,
from the dark of ancient Europa--
Why are you staring at me now
in the dusk of our civilization--
Why are you staring at me
as if I were America itself
the new Empire
vaster than any in ancient days
with its electronic highways
carrying its corporate monoculture
around the world
And English the Latin of our days--

Great Oracle, sleeping through the centuries,
Awaken now at last
And tell us how to save us from ourselves
and how to survive our own rulers
who would make a plutocracy of our democracy
in the Great Divide
between the rich and the poor
in whom Walt Whitman heard America singing

O long-silent Sybil,
you of the winged dreams,
Speak out from your temple of light
as the serious constellations
with Greek names
still stare down on us
as a lighthouse moves its megaphone
over the sea
Speak out and shine upon us
the sea-light of Greece
the diamond light of Greece

Far-seeing Sybil, forever hidden,
Come out of your cave at last
And speak to us in the poet's voice
the voice of the fourth person singular
the voice of the inscrutable future
the voice of the people mixed
with a wild soft laughter--
And give us new dreams to dream,
Give us new myths to live by!
Read at Delphi, Greece, on March 21, 2001 at the UNESCO World Poetry Day

4/11-Browning Sonnet-

Ladies can do the sonnet thing too. Eat this, Shakespeare:

Sonnet 43 by Elizabeth Browning

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.
I love thee to the depth and breadth and height
My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight
For the ends of being and ideal grace.
I love thee to the level of every day's
Most quiet need, by sun and candle-light.
I love thee freely, as men strive for right.
I love thee purely, as they turn from praise.
I love thee with the passion put to use
In my old griefs, and with my childhood's faith.
I love thee with a love I seemed to lose
With my lost saints. I love thee with the breath,
Smiles, tears, of all my life; and, if God choose,
I shall but love thee better after death

4/10-Haiku-

I told you at the beginning I wasn't going to make you suffer through my terrible poetry: I lied. From my VeryBadPoetry page here are 4 haikus:

I.
You want a threesome?
You don't have a large enough
bed and I won't share.

II.
I am a hero.
I am strong, smart, and can fly.
I'm perfect; love me.

III.
I farted one time.
I hoped you didn't hear it.
It turned you on, though.

IV.
Rabbits can run fast,
and they think they're such tough guys,
but foxes can too.